independent thinking huh~

sometimes i find myself in the middle of nowhere...but it doesnt mean that am not exist..i am there, in front of everybody, but making myself invisible...making people having NO heart to care about me...as if i have NONE business to do wif everybody... weird huh?

maybe the life that i live on is totally different. doesnt mean that am SO special, but who u r to expect me putting smile on my face all the time when i have so many, many disastrous events in my life? grateful i am, for everything that make me stronger and maturer...the thing is, people cant see the world through my lens...

the reason why i am so different( in my humble opinion) is bcause the culture, the background i gained al through 23 years...ahax, i am mixed...between east borneo and north peninsular. i am mixed, pattani, jawa and pure malay. i am mixed, between a kind-hearted person and rebellious one...thanx to Laksamana Bentan for his blood...hahaha...

why, why on earth iv been thinking like this.i know my ego would never let go all of the miserable feelings to throw out here, where this beautiful place should be the spot where im supposed to stand for myself, be optimistic of my world around...

crap, again
and today i found out that the manly or boyish characteristic is still with me...i thought i have become a proper lady, with a proper behavior these days...but this particular unlucky guy has triggered something in me that iv neve ever feel in 2-3 years time...omg, i rly wanna punch his head and back kick him &*%...'memajal' btol ini org...dui dogok...

wo, haziqah...what have u done? what do u have in mind?
"well, just being frank"
esok, forgive everyone p/s to the person concerned, i am sorry for the shock i gave

now, here to stop writing. time to have shower, maghrib time is so close...